Greetings from Bottom Shelf Russ to all you loyal PBAndAwesome.com followers! I have taken up both pen and bottle once again to say a few words about our upcoming anniversary. A few words.
As you well know, this is an election year here in America, and we are facing many difficult issues. Speeches are made and we are avalanched with sound bites galore on all medias.
Many of us are unhappy with the choice of candidates we are being offered. So, I, Bottom Shelf Russ being of un-sound mind and not so firm body, do hereby declare my intentions to run for the highest office in the land!
No, not dog catcher, but the Presidency of the United States of America......{cue sound of crickets in night}...
Yes, it's true! I will be running on the Bottom Shelf party ticket(henceforth referred to as the BS party). The BS party is probably the oldest party in existence, stretching back to Puritan times. It was the party of Tom Jefferson and the rest of his descendants like George Jefferson, Jefferson Darcy, and Jefferson Starship! The BS party transcends all cultures. We cross all political spectrums. There is a proud tradition in the BS party of cheap bottom shelf whiskey for all! E Pluribus Eunich!!
Our BS platform will include more taxes on the 1% top shelfers. There will be no worries about un-secure e-mails as BS'ers use only sticky notes, which are very secure. I would ask congress to enact a special tax to any cheap whiskey producers that insist on using plastic bottles. I would appoint supreme court justices that are more tolerant of those that live in refrigerator boxes and use shopping carts to hold all their possessions. I would approve a pipeline from Canada thru the USA to Mexico to carry bottom shelf whiskey! I will build that wall... around liquor stores, party stores and Walmart to secure their booze... and they will pay for it!
Next time you here from BS Russ, I will reveal my choice for V.P., my campaign song, and our BS party slogan, plus some other stuff.
So long for now. Here's looking up yours!
P.S. If you like this type of blog, please make sure you tell someone about it.. You know, tweet, plus one, like it on Facebook, and the the rest.
Love and peace from Bottom Shelf Russ.