Bottom Shelf Mixology Rejected NFL Drinks: AFC South

Welcome to Bottom Shelf Mixology™!  Our staff of Mixologists have racked their brains (and livers) to come up with special "bottom shelf" versions of popular drinks, and some original creations that range from "oh, that might be interesting" to "that sounds absolutely disgusting".  

Week five of the NFL season starts tonight, and that means it is also time for part five of our eight part series of Rejected NFL Drinks.  We've been making nasty rejected drink for each team in the league and posting a division at a time.

Today, we've got our drinks for the AFC South.

Indianapolis Colts

• 3 oz Fleischmann's Whiskey
• 3 oz Karo Corn Syrup

Pour the corn syrup into your glass.  Stir in the whiskey.

Keep telling yourself you will be okay without Andrew Luck.

Jacksonville Jaguars

• 24 oz Blue Raspberry Drink
• 8 oz Blue Curacao
• 8 oz El Matador Tequila
• Sea Salt
• 40 oz Bottle (doesn't matter what kind of beer)
• Paper Bag
• Funnel

Chug the beer.

Using the funnel, pour the blue raspberry drink, blue curacao, and tequila into the now empty bottle.

Drink while carrying the bottle in a paper bag.

After drinking it all, cut eye holes in the bag, and place the bag over your head, so that no one recognizes you at the Jaguars game.

Houston Texans

A.k.a. Clowney Car Bomb

• 1 can Schlitz Beer
• 1 Tbps Flour
• 1 cube Beef Bouillon
• 1 oz Heaven Hill Whiskey
• 1 oz Baileys Irish Cream

Pour the beer into a glass.  Stir in the flour to thicken it up a bit, and add the bouillon for color.  Now, it's more like a stout!

Drop in the shot glass with whiskey and Irish cream.

This drink will mess you up like it was J.J. Watt himself tearing his way through your digestive tract!

Tennessee Titans

A.k.a. Attack on Tennessee

• 16 oz Absinthe

Drink and forget about your terrible team.  And everything else.

Up next: the NFC South.

Previous Divisions:

AFC East

NFC East

AFC North

NFC North