Bio Zombie
(Media Blasters, 2001)
Tonight's movie is a special treat. It was something that a friend introduced me to. He handed me a DVD case that was mostly in Chinese. Inside this case was a movie called Bio-Zombie. He told me if I liked it I could keep it because he bought the Region 1 version. I honestly wish I could find the Region 1 version because I hear the English dub (this disc only has English subs) is funny as hell.
Here is the description from the back of the DVD case: 2 fun-loving hustlers play joke with a stranger by bottomed him up with his "wine" which is in fact a bio-chemical weapon that can destroy the world. Now the stranger turns into a zombie and cries out for revenge. Yeah. That's kind of close. Try this one: A soft drink tainted with bio-chemicals has the power to turn people into flesh-eating zombies. A man drinks from the bottle, and wanders into the night. As two young VCD sellers from a local mall are returning to the mall with their bosses' car, they hit the man. Unsure of what to do, they bring the man back to the mall with them. The mall closes, and soon there are zombies everywhere! A small group of mall employees must bond together to try and fight their way out. Better, although still not quite accurate.
(Before you say anything, I had to use this trailer, because the other ones give too much away.)
The movie starts out with people watching the opening credits. They start talking about two guys sitting close to each other to watch the movie who they call gay. After the title card is shown, one of the guys, according to the subtitles, wants to stool now.
We are then shown the two main characters Woody Invincible and Crazy Bee, walking through the mall. Woody is ogling all the women, and Crazy Bee wants to see a movie. While peering through a shop window, Crazy Bee pulls out a GameBoy with GameBoy Camera! Awesome.
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| Nothing like a GameBoy Camera image of cleavage! |
After they go to pick it up, we get a nighttime shot of an undisclosed location where a shady deal is going down. Turns out these guys are dealing in bio-chemical weapons. They just so happen to be bottled in what looks like a normal soft drink bottle. They have a zombie there, chained up, who was a guy who drank half of a bottle of the stuff. The zombie breaks free, and one of the men, who has the bottle runs off. After Woody and Crazy Bee hit the guy, he starts saying "soft drink", so Woody and Crazy bee grab the bottle and give the man a drink. Then they load the guy up into the car to hide him from the police and they head back to the mall. The guy turns into a zombie, and I think you can figure out what goes down. I won't get into any more details, because I'm fairly certain that not many people here have seen this movie, and I don't want to spoil the fun for anybody.
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| Must resist urge to make bad finger food joke... |
This movie was a complete surprise to me, and I wasn't sure what to expect. It turned out to be pretty good, and it is something that I enjoy watching. It also has a surprisingly decent story and is pretty funny . This movie is nowhere near big budget, but it makes pretty decent use of what budget was available. If you can get your hands on a copy of this movie, I highly suggest taking the time to watch it. It even has a great ending that has divided fans!
I now give you a selection of some of the better examples of the fine subtitles from this movie:
"So big is the light!" (While checking out a woman's cleavage)
"If I punch you, you should stay where you are!"
"It's itchy!" "That's the right feeling!" (This is during a "love scene")
"You have got an acne."
COMING SOON:
Bubba Ho-Tep
Pitch Black
Dead Alive
Slither
The Gate